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Loss of Sexual Desire in Women; Lack of Interest in Sex

Abstract: Loss of sexual desire in women can be caused by stress, or be a natural variation. It can also depend on your partner.

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Loss of Sexual Desire in Women; Lack of Interest in Sex

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Written by: , certified psychologist and certified psychotherapist, teacher and tutor in psychotherapy.
First version: 22 Jul 2008.
Latest revision: 23 Jul 2008.

I would just like to know how one can go about curing not having a interest in sex. I am 27 years old female who has not been interested in sex for the past 18 months. iI has begun to put strain on my relantionship with my boyfriend, I would like to get married to him, but because I am having problems with sex it does not seem that it would develop to marriage.

Can you please help me.


Did something special happen 18 months ago, which may have caused you to lose interest in sex?

Did you fall out of love?

Don't you get satisfied when you're having sex?

Does your current lack of interest concern just your boyfriend or is it a general feeling?

A lack of sexual interest can be conditional on the personal situation, such as a stressful job or family problems, or it may reflect problems between you and your partner, or some learned experiences from your past. In those cases, it can be cured by a psychotherapist, preferably one experienced with sexual problems.

It can also be due to some basic natural variation. It is established that people have different needs for sex. Some want sex once a month, while others want it several times a day, and some do not want to have sex at all. This natural variation can't be labeled an "illness" which can be "cured."

It is a good idea to find a partner who is compatible within this area ,so as not to create any problems. It can, however, be difficult to find a man when one is not at all interested in sex, since it's the erotic attraction which helps people find each other in the first place. I have met several young men who have been disappointed in their partner's lack of sexual interest. There seems to exist a difference in gender. However, I have also met women who haven't been interested in sex with one man, but who feel sexual desire return when they met a mate who is more compatible.

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